Syphilis Sophie

Behind The Times

I was conversing with a very good friend of mine whose progressiveness I severely underestimated. 
We spoke about venereal diseases and how rolling the sex dice could spell life-long trouble for the unlucky. At the time, I'd gotten the clap, and I went on a rampant rant about how reckless it was of me to raw dog this chick–I was dialed into Drunk FM, and I found out.

Depraved Disenchantment 

The person I was talking to asked, in disbelief, "Omg, was this your first time?" Yeah, I guess; sorry to disappoint here, Soph, for not contracting syphilis at the age of eight. She made it sound like STDs were some form of adolescent battle scars that speak to the formidability of one's body count.

Yeah, get outta here with that weak shit. Call me when you got AIDS.